Friday, May 13, 2011

Day .... wait what day is it

Well, for time in the hospital without getting let out to come home, even for a couple hours, then we're on day 5. 15 days since we took him in for lethargy and the biliruben in the urine. Just about two weeks since the diagnosis. From our standpoint though, it would have been day 6, the number of days since our Toby acted like our Toby. Lil buddy stands less than a foot off the ground and weighs in at a whopping 15 lbs (if he's sporting some winter weight), but he is a beast. He's got the fluffy maltipoo tail that could cut through steel when he's real excited. When we walk him he constantly pulls on the leash, a behavior we constantly try to curb but now miss. Really, many of the things we have been trying to train out of Toby are things we would be happy to see. Pulling on the leash, barking when we come home and, of course, the quick bark, pause and running outside to bark at any dog being walked by our yard!

Things had been getting tough, seeing your kid with barely the strength to situp is not easy. Worse is looking into his eyes and seeing the plea, the look that cries "please make it all better dad." Last night though, we got to see Toby, our little guy, He sat right up and had tons of besos for us. We took the camera in this morning and caught his face licking, smiling happiness.

face licking goodness

yeah, he licks his own face too

and a good solid head shake

It was a small victory but it meant a great deal. There had been some tough conversations about what the right thing to do was, whether we were doing this for us or if Toby would want this. Lots of tears, lots of leaning on family for love, but seeing Toby brought us all back together, back to the fight.

We just got back from the hospital and the nurse on duty suggested we take him out to see if he wants to pee. He did, and the good news about that was that she tested him and he didn't have any ketones in his urine, suggesting he is through the DKA. After he peed he stood at the edge of the sidewalk, looking at our car. He knows it's ours, he knows he wants to go in it, he knows he wants to be at home with us. We miss Toby, we miss the little white fluff trotting through the house and that big pom pom of a tail wagging in excitement. Night Toby, we'll see you in the morning.

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